speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
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