White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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