dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
