I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
