I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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