what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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