so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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