i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
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