Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize