Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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