She's JV to your varsity
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize
