The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
