I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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