That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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