We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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