She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Randomize
