This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
