Texts From Last Night

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  (740): View more from Ohio

  Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight

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  (740): Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook. (740): Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight http://tfl.nu/qdoi
  Replies (23) Good night (728) Bad night (2870)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.

  (1-816): View more from Missouri

  So we're fucking tonight?

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  (816): You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf. (1-816): So we're fucking tonight? http://tfl.nu/2x8n
  Replies (12) Good night (4423) Bad night (1302)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.

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  (817): HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis. http://tfl.nu/iuvq
  Replies (28) Good night (5944) Bad night (895)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.

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  (678): What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick. http://tfl.nu/v9tv
  Replies (11) Good night (3927) Bad night (1013)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.

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  (952): I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me. http://tfl.nu/xnge
  Replies (55) Good night (10580) Bad night (1219)
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  (337): View more from Louisiana

  I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...

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  (337): I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job... http://tfl.nu/0251
  Replies (5) Good night (2165) Bad night (705)
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  (760): View more from California

  Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.

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  (760): Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now. http://tfl.nu/d97x
  Replies (6) Good night (636) Bad night (1501)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.

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  (+44): Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room. http://tfl.nu/d3jd
  Replies (5) Good night (1350) Bad night (526)
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  (415): View more from California

  I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".

  (415): View more from California

  good luck with that

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  (415): I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco". (415): good luck with that http://tfl.nu/41gz
  Replies (4) Good night (885) Bad night (939)
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?

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  (224): We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today? http://tfl.nu/c57g
  Replies (16) Good night (1554) Bad night (449)
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  (516): View more from New York

  I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.

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  (516): I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents. http://tfl.nu/ifal
  Replies (2) Good night (383) Bad night (1608)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.

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  (419): Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing. http://tfl.nu/8u2a
  Replies (14) Good night (1337) Bad night (425)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  Fuck yeah GAYNESS

  (415): View more from California

  *explodes into glitter*

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  (415): Fuck yeah GAYNESS (415): *explodes into glitter* http://tfl.nu/o7gi
  Replies (3) Good night (905) Bad night (205)
• Favorite

  (779): View more from Illinois

  Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now

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  (779): Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now http://tfl.nu/zs7j
  Replies (1) Good night (209) Bad night (403)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors

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  (212): Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors http://tfl.nu/gwrw
  Replies (0) Good night (331) Bad night (186)

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