I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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