her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize