dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Randomize
