ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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