i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
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