Ambien. No doubt about it.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Randomize
