I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
