I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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