Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
