Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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