I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
