Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
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He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
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I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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