Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
do nipples grow back?
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