My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
How naked do you want me to be?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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