I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
