So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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