Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
