im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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