Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
