im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
