so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
