yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
