We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
