One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
