is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
she pinky promised me she was 18
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize