What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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