12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
