You just made me feel so damn special
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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