yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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