So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
