I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
