So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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